Wives as we see in the passage below God calls you to respect your Husband in verse 33. In our society today, wives this is a very hard task to accomplish. A wife who truly wishes to conform to God's Will and fulfill this commandment, has a hard road to travel unless see allows the Holy Spirit to do it through her. There are very little examples for you to draw from in the world. Parental guidance has always taught you to be strong and independent. The media tells you to go and conquer the world. Your friends tell you that there are no good men out here and especially none worth giving up your identity for. In the meantime you have this Holy and Righteous God calling for your full submission to Him and to your husband. In order for this to take place you will have to allow the Holy Spirit to break generational bondage!!!
Once again you have no problem loving your husband, in the sense that you will sacrifice time and energy to benefit him. The problem most wives have is in truly respecting her Husband. This is because your natural being doesn't speak the language of respect. The first weapon a young girl learns to use is her tongue. She learns by the age of 5 or younger that if someone does something that hurts her in any way, she can defend herself by giving them a tongue lashing. While men defense mechanism is physical, women's is emotional. A physical pain will subside much easier than a word that was dealt to the bone of someone's existence. When we think about hurts that we suffered in our younger years that still hurt today, they were not physical, they were hurtful words spoken by someone who meant the world to us. This is not just a coincidence, the enemy knows that if he can train up a woman to use her tongue to cut down any opposition, when it's time for marriage she will use that same weapon any time she feels she needs to with her husband.
The bible states in Proverbs 18:21 "Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit." Most women are taught that in order to get a man to move in the direction you want them to go, insult them or nag them. Your also taught that words don't hurt a man, he is to be strong and get over it. The reason why your man doesn't move to the whipping of your tongue is because you are killing him inside out. There is not life being produced in him, it's death. He will become more and more like a corpse in your marriage if you continue to produce death with your tongue. Most people will not understand why a man would hit a woman in the street, especially his wife (Now he is 100% wrong in the matter), but the understanding comes from the fact that the one person that he is to care the most about just put a dagger in his heart (which physically felt like a dagger) from something she said and he reverted back to how he defends himself, which is with violence. Look back at the scripture from proverbs, it plainly says, that if you sow seeds of life with your tongue, you will reap the fruit of life. If you sow seeds of death with your tongue, you will reap the fruit of death.
The enemy wants nothing more than to show the world why they should not get married, and to defame the whole purpose of getting married which is to bring Glory to God, by showing the world the relationship of love between Christ and the Church. If you have been experiencing death in your marriage recently, try praying for a change in your heart towards your husband. Ask God to heal your hearts and at the same time teach you how to sow seeds of life into your husband's heart. It is never too late for this manifestation of the Holy Spirit to take place, you just have to submit to Christ and allow the Holy Spirit to get to work. There is nothing more beautiful than a wife being in a loving and committed relationship with a husband that loves her, like Christ loves the Church, trust me it is worth the effort!!! You will never feel as free in your life than when your marriage is operating as it ought to be under God's ordinance and you have truly given respect to your husband in full submission to him. Here is a standard to strive to and an example to go back to from time to time; Proverbs 31:10-31, which is spoken from a Mother to a Son which had become King!!! Be Encouraged!!! Have a wonderful life of enjoying Marriage on purpose!!!!!
Ephesians 5
Marriage—Christ and the Church
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. 24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. 28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. 30 For we are members of His body,[d] of His flesh and of His bones. 31 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”[e] 32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
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